An Epitaph for Eternity

Holy Week '75

As the world turns slowly on its axis
I fathom it
Clouds drift
Breezes pass
And waters flow
Yet, I remain

I am warmed by the sun
The waters soothe me
The breezes carry me

When I am gone
My blood shall flow as water
My flesh shall scatter as dust
And my spirit shall pass as the wind

I remain

10/12/09 9AM
Red Lion Pub
George Henry II

Who I Was

I was no one
I was me
I cared for no one
I was free
She who chose me
Set me free
I see
I care less

There I was
Here I am
Damn
Retrogress

I am Alone

I used to be a rock
Alone and uncared
Free nonetheless

Someone picked me up
Put me in a garden
To me, that was happiness

That person forgot me
Another rock among many
Alone again I guess

To my Friends

I thank the friends who stuck it out with me. When I wanted to speak, they were attentive. When I cried, they dried my tears. When I ran out of tears, the cried for me. When I wanted to be alone and pushed them away, they stayed and held my hand. When I kept silent, they listened with their hearts. Now it's my turn to be a friend. Thank you.

Make Love

i know its true
my love for you
when i hold your hand
i make love to you
when i look in your eyes
i make love to you
when i touch your skin
i make love to you
when our fingers connect
i make love to you
i love you in ways
you will never understand
i know of a man
who's heart's in his wand
when you ask him to make love
he'll pull off his pants

No Regret

my heart is tethered by a cord
anchored to another heart
twisted, braided, and bonded

betrayal and pain
has tugged at the twine
cutting and freeing the bond

slowly unwind
trust shattered
a noose no more

i tug at my end
i feel no regret
untie the knot
and free the heart

The Island

I stand alone
in a sea of loneliness
as far as i can see
i am a solitary rock
unfeeling uncaring
battered again and again
come storm
come waves
try to rip me apart
i will not fade
i will not break
i am an island
alone but ever free

Cryptic Void

an emptiness is in me
sucking away at life
a letter, a word, a thought
lost in the void of my mind
i keep on thinking
but its just confusing
mixed dreams and what is real
lost and found and lost again
that is how i now feel
what does it mean
i ask myself
the letters, the words, the thought
it just adds to the chaos
the cryptic void in my heart

The Edge

i pull out a knife
to slice you apart
to savor the smell of blood
i stab at your heart
i hack and i slash
ooooh i love this part
i leave you to die
i stare at your eyes
the life is now fading
your blood now pooling
my smile is now fading
the life i take is ending
rewind let's do this again

The Hate

the nearness of you
keeps me away
the farthest i've ever been

the closer you get
a move you'll regret
the slaughter will now begin

the pain i will share
the suffering you'll bear
the smile and evil grin

i will take my time
and take what is mine
in chaos i am your kin

with joy in my heart
i'll tear you apart
piece by piece i begin

my madness will grow
misery you'll know
i'll drink your blood with a grin

Depression (The Handyman)

i'm glad your home
where you belong
my lass my love my life
i gather all the villagers
from valleys far and wide
we form a band with spears and swords
a mob held by my hand
up to the cave to hunt the beast
for peace forever more

we kill the beast inhuman form
we'll make him feel your pain
he hurt you bad and made you sad
for this he has to go
we'll pull him down and cut him up
we'll tear him up real bad
for on this day the world will know
a happiness unknown

the dragon has now gone to hell
he will never take you home
be glad my lass and do not fear
the handyman is here
he'll build your house up on the hill
he'll take care of you kids

alas the dragon now is dead
it's head stuck on a stake
the handyman holds in his hand
the evil dragon's heart
a heart that was black but now is gold
to claim it for his wife

rejoice my lass let's celebrate
the dragon now is dead
never ever to return
you now belong to my bed
the lass is happy the lass is glad
she spits at the dragon's head

The Beast to Beauty

i gnarl and snarl
at people i love
i drive them away from me
yet this one girl
has touched my heart
melting it like snow in spring
the leaves grow back
and flowers will bloom
under the moonlit sky
i feel its too late
when i opened my heart
my belle was nowhere to be seen
come back my belle
come back to me
a beast i can no longer be
come back my love
come home again
let me treat you like a queen
a curse on me
a hearse for me
locked in this cell
for eternity
i love my belle
and set her free
hoping she'll come back one day
until that day
i wait and see
the petals falling like snow
when the last one falls
a smile you'll see
on that day i will be free

In Denial

i'm yours she said to one
i'm yours she said to two
to one she had no one
with two she loved so true
her love so true
she gave one too
the love was pushed away
her love to two
was given back
no one she loves today
cold as ice her heart became
her love was thrown away
one day she'll love
one day she'll stay
i'm hoping for that day

Memory

my heart skips a beat
to the sound of her voice

her scent lingers
like i don't have a choice

i try to forget
the love of my life

i can't

Endorphine

my heart is filled with sadness
confusion i know too well
this i embrace with gladness
i burn my dreams in hell

i turn my heart to the darkness
comfort and love i push
i welcome the pain in happiness
and now here comes the rush

Void

there's a hole in my soul
that will never be filled
by a heart that was given away
that hole will grow
and grow it will
until the soul has gone hell

from the sorrow and pain
the searing flames
consume at last the soul
emptiness and nothingness
fill me up to the brim
that i deserve a heart as well
impossible as it seems

Dream

i close my eyes
yet my thoughts wander
looking for the one i lost

i think i found her
but yet i wonder
is she the one for me

our souls entwined
like twisted vines
never one but together

as i open my eyes
and look around
the thought is lost with the dream

A Dying Heart

how far is the horizon
it's as far as you can see
why then do i not see it

how sweet is a song
it's as sweet as the sweetest honey
how then can i not hear it

how soft is a touch
it's as soft as a gentle breeze
when can i feel it

a dead heart does not see
nor will it hear
nor will it touch again

I am Dragon

i look at the moon
i smell the night air
i raise my head to a scream

i feel a change
a pain in my head
my back is now bleeding

the horns pop out
i spread my leathery wings
i fly to the moon to be free

i am me
i am darkness
i am free

Rehab

pounding
grinding
sound of drums with sand

screeching
screaming
voices in my head

i am who i am
sadness to the core
when will this end

I am a Raindrop

how does it feel to be a raindrop
one time up in the clouds
the next time splattered on the ground

slowly rising up in pieces
finding yourself up there again
only knowing that you will fall anytime

the anticipation
the fear
such is the cycle of love

Blade and the Pendulum

swish swoosh
it swings

tic toc
it drops

hard and cold it feels
sharp and sweet it cuts

pain i feel
sight will fade

smile i will
scream i hold

death unfolds
silence

Fade

cut me up
dice me fine
help me forget
that i am real

the pain i feel
the song i hear
calling me
to fall

i am one
soon to be gone
life no more
pain disappears

hear me cry
smile when i weep
i let go
gone